From the road...

(Written on Thursday, June 28)

Riding on I-70, headed eastward. Crying as we drove over the Missisippi, because I had just put in a disk in the computer and discovered that it worked. It was a disk of photos that a very kind woman had put together, a slideshow of photographs of Penecost programs at Grace Church, all programs that my good friend Kit designed. There she is, in her element, surrounded by people, butterflies and balloons. Carol Nuss put together the slideshow and they showed it at Grace Episcopal on Pentecost. Dean Sally told me that people watched it with tears in their eyes, but laughing, too. I was so relieved to see that the disk worked in my Mac, because she had put it together with a Windows program. And it worked, just fine. After we came down from Pike's Peak the other day, we drove to Carol's house, up by Garden of the Gods, to get that disk. (She's making a more edited one for Phil, with the music of James Galway playing "Wind Beneath My Wings." She showed it to me when I came to get the CD, and we held hands and watched it, both with tears. I never met her before but we were bound by our caring for Kit...)

I'm going to use the photos to make a notebook for each of the kids and Phil, and one for me, with the beautiful photos of Kit at church, and also the material from her application to become a deacon....an autobiography that she wrote and the answers from the committee which evaluated her application to become a deacon. It's lovely stuff, to keep and treasure. I never realized what a big deal it was, her being accepted to study to be a deacon.

I checked the other night; a plane ticket between Indy and Colorado Springs is only about $229 round-trip. Why didn't I go to see her more often? It makes me sick to think that I could have and didn't.

I hope that both my girls can join me to go out for the Rocky Mountain Women's Film Festival, the first weekend of November. I wrote to another old friend of Kit's and asked her if she could come as well, perhaps with her daughter.

We are now 220 miles from Indianapolis, so will arrive home late tonight. It's 7:10 Indiana time.

We are driving home a couple of days early because my mom was in the hospital this week, getting blood transfusions. I don't think they know what caused her anemia and to have some internal bleeding, evidently, but the situation seems to be better. She has had an EKG, a colonoscopy and an x-ray of her colon. So, she is back at home at Redbud Hills.

She knows that I will not be over to see her till tomorrow morning.

My emotions are so on the surface, after spending time at the Webster house. Phil and the kids were great, and we felt totally at home and had good times with each of them. But, I realized that I had to face Kit's death head-on, being there. It was somewhat easier at home, to pretend that she didn't die.

Phil and Jordie got along great, which made me feel good. We hiked and had meals togehter and hung out...Maddie and Abby and I went on a "ghost tour" at the haunted Stanley Hotel in Estes Park (the hotel inspired Stephen King to write "The Shining"). We all went on Timber Ridge Drive, beyond Estes Park, up to the fierce winds and glorious views much higher up. And I felt so good that I did a bunch of hiking....even though I was short of breath, I consciously breathed slowly and deeply and felt OK.

Time together in the car is even good. Just hanging out.